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Being Adopted: The Lifelong Search for Self

 

 

 

Being Adopted: The Lifelong Search for Self
by David M. Brodzinsky

From Publishers Weekly
Ingeniously integrating psychological and educational theories, the authors construct a model of the normal yet unique stages of adoptee development.
Copyright Reed Business Information, Inc.


From Kirkus Reviews
A rather thin volume that nevertheless will reassure adoptees that it is usual for questions about adoption and birth parents to persist throughout life. Using Erik Erikson's stages of life as a framework, Brodzinsky (Psychology/Rutgers) and Schechter (Psychiatry/Univ. of Pennsylvania), here writing with Henig (Your Premature Baby, 1983, etc.), call upon years of experience as researchers and counselors in the field of adoption to describe the continual adjustments that adoptees make as they grow from infancy to old age. Most moving is the litany of losses that move adoptees to grieve, often unknowingly. Even infants only a few months old show signs of mourning their first caretakers. Later, the authors say, adoptees may confront the loss not only of a birth family but of a personal and genetic history. The latter is particularly painful when it is time for young adults to begin their own families. Such life crises often kick off a search for birth parents. But the book's authority is undermined by what the authors frankly admit is the rapidly changing environment of adoption, where secrecy and shame are now rarely invoked and searches are often unnecessary. Open adoption-- in which the birth mother is known to and is often closely attached to the adoptive family--and increasingly available birth records eliminate the information gap that most often causes stress in adopted families (although open adoption may create its own set of stresses, the authors point out). Replete with anecdotal material, this offers few new insights but does lay out issues of development that only adoptees face over the course of life. -- Copyright 1992, Kirkus Associates, LP. All rights reserved. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.


Ingram
Recent studies have shown that being adopted can affect many aspects of adoptees' lives, from relationships with adoptive parents to bonds with their own children. Using their combined total of 55 years experience in clinical and research work with adoptees and their families, the authors use the voices of adoptees themselves to trace how adoption is experienced over a lifetime.


From the Publisher
Like Passages, this groundbreaking book uses the poignant, powerful voices of adoptees and adoptive parents to explore the experience of adoption and its lifelong effects. A major work, filled with astute analysis and moving truths.

 

5 out of 5 stars A compassionate book for adoptees, birth and adoptive parent, September 18, 2003

  Reviewer: Gisela Gasper Fitzgerald from USA

I am not an adoptee but I can imagine that I would have experienced the unique stages the authors describe of adoptees as they grow up and try to cope with their past. I like the compassionate but also dispassionate tone of the authors as they lay out their balanced view of adoption, enlightening not only adoptees but also the general public. It is good, too, that the authors point out not all adoptees feel the same way, that some are greatly troubled by their adoption while others are less concerned about their past. A good book for everyone to learn from.
Gisela Gasper Fitzgerald, author of ADOPTION: An Open, Semi-Open or Closed Practice?

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5 out of 5 stars Very Balanced, July 8, 2003

  Reviewer: A reader from Alpharetta, GA USA

I liked this book because it was a balanced view of adoption. I found it validating. It showed that within my peer group - adoptees - I was very normal. This helped. It also showed that although some people react with great desperation to adoption others seem to take it more in stride and that is normal too. Regardless of how you feel, this book is a must read. Enlightening, validating and no whining. Thank you to the authors.

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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

5 out of 5 stars Understanding The Whys of Why I Feel This Way, February 10, 2003

  Reviewer: Isabel Jackson from Westbrook, Connecticut, USA

This book is right on target. It showed me the reasons for why I've felt the way I have for so many years. I'm 55 and was adopted in infancy. My adopted Mother never told me anything and I always felt left out and some how all alone in this world. Now I understand why I feel the way I have all these years. It's natural and normal. This is an excellent book for adoptees to understand why their feelings are mixed, confused, and not totally feeling a part of this world. I'd recommend this book to all adoptees.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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